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Speak now…

Speak now…

I don’t remember a lot about high school.  It is a defense mechanism, I am sure.  After all, my dad passed away when I was fourteen. My childhood was lost in a moment. I had no patience for teenage angst and drama. I stopped being able to relate to my friends.  After all, I was dealing with life changing issues.  And I wasn’t exactly coping to well.

Growing up, I was always a quiet and shy girl.  Somehow I managed to come out of my shell when I turned twelve.  But when my dad passed away, I reverted. I barely spoke. I kept to myself.

Public speaking was a required class.  The thought of it made my stomach flip.  It was a nightmare, or so I thought.

All these years later, unlike so much from that period of time, I remember every inch of the classroom. I remember my teacher too.  He was a man, whose claim to fame was teaching Howard Stern.  I don’t think he taught one class without reminding us of that little tidbit.  He was a hard ass too.  He didn’t have much patience.  I dreaded my first speech…

But then something strange happened.  I got up there and discovered that the reality wasn’t as bad as my imagination expected. Even though my voice was probably no more than a whisper,  I felt comfortable. I realized I could speak in front of people.  I also realized I liked it.

The shy and quiet girl I once was is now gone.  I tell people about her, and they don’t usually believe me.  And over the years, I have had to speak in front of groups of people.  Sometimes it was a prepared speech. Other times, it was on the fly.  Regardless, I no longer have any fear. I am comfortable. I love it.

When I the opportunity presented itself to do a book reading and singing at Barnes and Noble I jumped at it!  It was a dream come true to read an excerpt of Dangled Carat at the large bookstore.

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I was thrilled to see how many people turned out for me, Meredith Schorr and Jennifer Gracen.

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We took turns reading excerpts of our books as well as discussing them.  The crowd was great!  They asked amazing questions.IMG_1995

It was such a high reading, or should I say acting out my story, especially when the crowd laughed at the right parts.  I couldn’t help think about that shy and quiet girl I once was.  I knew in that moment, during my five minutes of fame, she was proud of me.

 
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UbEN9ZexLi0
Public speaking… do you love it or hate it?

24 thoughts on “Speak now…

  1. I love this post and I loved hearing your voice! I think we all have the insecurities sometimes that can define us but you obviously overcame a lot to be where you are today. I am so happy to call you friend! 🙂

  2. This is absolutely awesome, Hilary! I’m so happy to see where that shy girl you were has evolved to today! What a smashing success. I listened to the video…I love it when I can hear bloggers actual voices. I absolutely LOVE your voice, my dear!! 🙂

    1. Ellen – thanks so much. It was very difficult being that young. I agree, high school is over rated! I would have loved you to have gone too. it was fun!

    1. Susi – I would so love to do one in Florida! I will have to put you and Loretta in charge of advertising though 🙂

  3. This is so awesome, Hilary. Thank you for sharing your very personal journey and growth with all of us. We bet your Dad and Alex are watching, smiling and proud of who you’ve become. Hugs!

  4. Yeah for you!! that is awesome!
    I used to be terrified of speaking in front of people… so of course my high school drama teacher put me in the school play!!! LOL She felt if you were afraid of something — than you should absolutely do it!! And after I did the play and of course, all was well: I have kind of adopted that mantra throughout my life.

    1. Rorybore – I have to admit I agree with your HS drama teacher, but I don’t like when I have to confront my fears head on though…

    1. Ebone – thank you so much… I am so glad you liked it and it gave you a chuckle… I hope you enjoy Dangled!

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