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Here and now…

Here and now…

I’ve been thinking about time a lot lately. I keep wishing for more of it (or the ability to not sleep). It seems like there is never enough time in a day to do both what you need to and want to do.

I’ve been feeling torn. I have so many balls in the air right now, more than usual. I don’t feel like I can properly keep the juggling act going much longer. But I’m afraid to stop trying. I do know I can’t continue to go on the way I have been. The stress level has been way too high. I’ve not been happy, and I haven’t been fun to be around either.

I was chatting with my friend, the amazing and talented Meredith Schorr, about my feelings last week. The conversation turned to working on a day off. This is something I have done since technology allowed. And something I planned to do over the holidays. The problem with staying connected is you never fully accomplish what you need to and you never fully enjoy your day. But more important you never feel like you had a break. You return to work, just as stressed and cranky as you were when you left.

Meredith told me something her dear friend and boss once told her… “Problems will be there whether you there to see them or not so you might as well enjoy your free time while you get it.”

Her words really hit home with me. The sentiment was so true. I have allowed so many days and nights to be ruined because of an insignificant issue. I decided I was going to break my pattern, or at least try to.

I did wake up bright and early on Christmas Eve (4:30 AM to be exact) and logged into my office. I worked for about two hours, but then I closed up the computer and decided to stay in the moment. We have friends visiting from Florida. They were talking their kids ice skating and bowling. I have always wanted to skate but never really did.10592899_10206974173226289_8807543530804261975_n

Well that changed! I skated for the first time on Christmas Eve. I bowled and I got two strikes and countless gutter balls. I ate White Castle for the first time (although I wish that part I skipped). The day flew by and was filled with laughter and fun. And I did the unthinkable for me. Not only did I not check my phone constantly for emails and messages I left my phone home….

Do you work on your days off? 

30 thoughts on “Here and now…

  1. I so “get” this. While I don’t have a job like you do I find myself being so distracted by keeping current on social media that it can cut into my valuable family and friend time . I made the vow to keep the JOY this Christmas, not stress over what did or did not get done and just try to enjoy being in the moment. I did okay but not great. I have a week of down time in Florida coming up so I intend to just BE in the moment and do what I want to do and catch up on MY stuff that I want to catch up on. Sometimes you just have to be a little selfish, right? Thanks for sharing. Happy New Year, my friend!

    1. Beth Ann – Happy New year too – I think if we are honest, we all struggle with managing technology in some way shape or form.

  2. One of the downsides of technology is that we can be connected anytime anywhere.
    And we do! No one talks because they are checking the phone,etc.
    We feel the need to be busy and we have lost the ability to enjoy ourselves.
    Leaving your phone home is a big step and as you found out, the world kept turning 🙂
    Enjoy finding ways to have FUN.
    Nancy and the kitties

    1. Mickey – It was so freeing. I need to do it more often. I love technology but I really think it has gone too far… I miss human interaction

  3. So glad you came out with us and had a good time. Can’t believe our week here is over already and we are getting ready to head back home. Thanks so much for everything to you and Marc!!! xoxo <3

    1. Susi – I am so glad I did too.. And i can’t believe it has taken me this long to reply to the blog post comments… UGH

  4. This is great! Good job (no pun intended!), Hilary. I read your question on facebook and quickly popped over to say ‘yes’ to your question and then to work today. We had the 23rd off, but … I mostly worked, because there were a few issues. But like you, after that day, I put the work laptop and phone away and haven’t touched them until about 30 minutes ago 🙂 It is something we all need to learn, in a hurry: Disconnect to de-stress and really get a break. I am very happy that you managed to do it and that Susi & Co. were there to give you a shove – hahaha

    1. Claudia – When you actually take a break it is so freeing. I felt so much better going into work on Monday after my break.. But I find it so hard to actually break.. I take everything so seriously, but really you do need to recharge- you are more effective that way…

  5. This makes me so happy to read. Not only that Alan’s words (delivered through me) inspired you, but that you were able to fully embrace the freedom of the day. I’m sure it will be a constant struggle to do on a regular basis but each win is a victory that should be celebrated. Yay you!!

    1. Meredith – I am so glad you shared Alan’s words with me. I am trying to follow his advice although it is a struggle. I took the afternoon off yesterday from work, and I couldn’t stop checking my emails…

  6. I don’t work on my day job during time off, but I usually use time off to work on my own projects. I completely understand the pull between what you need to do and what you want to do. However, I am not the person to ask because I usually just give up sleep, which I know in the long run will impact my health – but can’t seem to figure out a way to get everything accomplished otherwise. Hoping to find better balance in 2016!

    1. Daily Pip – it is sad that sleep is something that usually gets given up because then you risk wearing yourself thin and getting sick. I find it so hard not to work on my time off. I feel like I need to stay connected and it is such a struggle…

    1. Inner chick – I am trying to do the same but I usually am not successful – especially when it comes to work.

  7. Yeah!!!! Good for you.
    Hope you hugged that wonderful visiting family a lot for the rest of us too! 🙂

    My past year has been all about being more Present. More Mindful. And you absolutely cannot remain in that mindset AND be active on social media. The constant notifications on my phone pulls me away from whatever my “currently” is supposed to be. That doesn’t mean I never check… it just means I don’t obsess about it. I save my mini breaks for when I need exactly that: a mini break of distraction. Then back to what matters. My blog could be bigger. My reach further. My Twitter numbers higher…. but the house would rarely be clean and dinner never on time. And THAT is what I stayed home to be; not a Media Mogul.
    The offside to ignoring social media more? I have found much more time to actually WRITE! Which is what my true passion is. And it’s been nice to rediscover it. 🙂

    1. Rorybore – You are so right… It is such a struggle to stay present. I hate that I can’t pass my phone without checking it constantly. Social media is so great, and a lot of fun, but it really does take up so much time…

  8. I don’t know if you are the owner of your business (but you call it a job) so I am going to assume (which I know can be a mistake but I am taking that chance lol) It does sound like you are in a top position though but my husband owns his own company and he had that problem with some of his employees not taking sufficient time off. Therefore, he actually instituted a policy that an employee must take a five day vacation at least once a year(Monday through Friday) and when they do take vacation they are not allowed to do emails or check in. He informed his employees that if an owner can step away from the company and shut down, he said not to hurt your feelings but an employee definitely can because he told them, trust me, an owner has way more invested in the company and way more on his plate than any of them. He said it did wonders for his employees, now they take their time off and he can tell how much better they are when they come back to work. Lastly,you need to remind yourself that ‘yes,I do a great job and they need me when I am working but if for some reason I never returned to the job, everyone would survive.’ That thinking will help you understand you are not your job, you should enjoy your time off and you actually need the break.

    1. Lucy – you nailed it. I am not an owner but I am in a top position of a company that has 100+ employees. I think your husband is brilliant, and i bet that people are more productive now then before. I find myself getting in situations where things are so busy and stressful I just go at warp speed but it doesn’t help. I am finding if I do take time for myself, I am happier and more productive. But it is a struggle. I am so committed and care so much, as if it is my own business. My dad had an expression which your last comment reminded me of. He used to say you bust your butt for your job your whole life. You retire / die and 6 months or a year later someone says, wow, he was a great guy… what was his name again…. It is sad but true. I have to try to remember his words…

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