HELLO! Is anyone out there?
Nod if you can hear me. Or read this. Or whatever…
Seriously. I’m I’ve had it. Sure you all know I’m angry at her for keeping me away from my bloggy friends. I don’t care that her day job is kicking her butt and she can barely breathe this summer. Not my problem! I don’t care if she is too overwhelmed to type up my stories to share. But she always makes her problems mine. What is with parents anyway.
I was able to keep my rage to a minimum, but not anymore. The unspeakable happened. They went away for a few days. *Apparently* Mommy needed a break. And Daddy did too. But a break from me? WTH? Fortunately, they made arrangments, and my uncle B came and took care of me. Truth be told, I liked having some new peeps here. The old ones were starting to get boring (see the above paragraph).
Something happened when my parents were gone. Or when they came home. I’m not sharing the exact timeline. I want the parents to keep guessing – serves them right for leaving me in the first place. I got sick.
I tried to hide it the best from my parents, but they aren’t as dumb as they look (which is pretty dumb). They realized when I kept running into my bathroom and not making something was wrong. They couldn’t just leave well enough alone and give me some time. NO! They had to haul me off to the vet, pronto.
Now here is the deal. I haven’t driven in a car since last year when they moved me away from the beach. I haven’t gone to the vet since I was a baby and got spayed. My Uncle Ira, the best vet in Florida, examines me once a year. So can you imagine how kindly I took to this trip??????
Mommy is still twitching at how much I yelled, screamed, hissed, and tried to scratch and smack the doctor and her assistant. They had to examine me wearing thick gloves because I raging. Eventually, I got home (fortunately not to a new one this time) and the parents started acting very odd. They closed off their bedroom where my favorite bathroom is. And in my other bathroom, they emptied my box and put in this small weird litter thing. I kept going in the bathroom and jumping out. They were on my tail like white on rice. I couldn’t take it.I took a long nap and woke up hoping this was all a bad dream.
When I woke up the dream got worse. They then locked me in the downstairs bathroom with food and water and the weird litter box. They made sure the video camera recorded my every move. REALLY? I know my mom’s obsessive and compulsive. I knew she’d have her eyes glued to that thing all night. So, I gave them what they wanted. I peed in the weird litter and then they rescued me from my isolation.
I still don’t feel right. My mommy’s bringing my stolen pee to the doctor this AM. They will find out if I have crystals or an infection. I really hope I feel better soon. And I hope the parents have learned their lesson. Don’t mess with the cat!